Boy, that is a big question.
As you might have noticed, there hasn’t been a lot of update here on TroyRutter.com lately. In fact, after attending BlogWorld Expo in Las Vegas last October, my blogging and podcasting have slowed to a crawl.
The reason is simple:
I lost my way.
After so many years of trying to find a voice, of blogging daily or trying to – eventually it came to be too much. I found that I was putting out a lot of noise, and people were consuming it, but it really didn’t “mean” anything. I was creating content for others, but getting very little in return – both in terms of comments on the blog, calls to the podcast, and adsense clicks.
Blogging is cyclic for me. On one hand, I would really love to be blogging for real dollars. Not just for the money, but for the freedom it gives. Freedom to do what I want, when I want, how I want. I dread the 9-5. (which is more like 8-6.) Hate it. My ideal job would be as an information publisher blogging, writing articles, writing more books, podcasting, creating videos – being an active part of the community I live in.
Instead, I drive to work 45 minutes or so each way and put in my time.
The last few months have been trying, and honestly the motivation for blogging – just to be blogging – hasn’t been there. If you’ve followed my posts at all over the years you know I don’t give in to the crap some people throw up (literally) onto the web. The web and social media isn’t all positive thinking and talk about Crushing It or creating Tribes. (Sorry Gary and Seth)
The part I missed out on is the supportive part. I have tried so hard since 1995 to make a name for myself and achieve some sort of financial well-being for being a leader in “the space”, and nothing has come of it. I was starting to think maybe I was now too old, that I missed out on the good 401K, health benefits, and “coolness” of a company I want to be part of. I have a very small (but very loyal) support system, and I hope to be able to grow that.
So, I’m starting to come out of my “funk” and I hope to be blogging about my journey more than I have been. I’m also taking the weight loss thing very seriously now, and hope to have results I can post. I so want to be the guy others say “wow, look at how much weight he’s lost” instead of “ew… look at all the weight he’s gained.”
After several years of doing things for other people, it’s time to be just a little bit selfish and do something for me. I hope you will stay with me for the ride.

