All the books that tell you “when people call you on the phone at work angry and upset, they aren’t mad at YOU, so be cheerful and don’t take it personally.”
Lies.
And impossibilities. You have to take it personally. If you don’t… something’s wrong with you.
I take it personally, and try to fix things to the best of my ability. And then I write about it in my journal, asking myself what I could do to make things better… what more could I say, what tone could I have used… naw… then I go kick things in the back room to make myself feel better.